SOS: What No Woman Wants to Hear

That's right:  its time to get serious about training again.  I've got some races picked out, and am ready to really focus on my performances.  I bought this book hoping that the author would tell me something like..."You're perfect the way you are! You just need to be doing 50-60 miles per week, that's all."  Instead, what I got was "Lose 10 pounds."

Oh, frr rrlllll?!

So frustrating.  I mean, I know that. But who really wants to hear it? And I've been trying to lose those proverbial "last ten pounds" since they found me.  My diet, by the way, is stellar, with the exception of a very robust sugar addiction.  Which, according to the author, I should try to feed with fruits and dark chocolate. *GAAAAAGGGGG*  to the dark chocolate (for  a primer on my strange food preferences, please go here and here ). 

So, now that my summer programming is under way at work, my grad class is over for the term, and I have a bit of a regular routine I can follow, I'll need to start incorporating certain things into my life if I want to be in "peak performance" for my upcoming races.  Like, breakfast everyday (duh). And more carbs (so, my preference for PB & J sandwiches can be indulged).  And more lean protein (note to self:  make friends with local fishermen).  And less sugar (DOH!). 

I guess I should also start running regularly again if I want to creep closer to that 4-hour marathon finish I want so badly.  And start doing some weight training again.  And start getting 8-9 hours of sleep each night.  And probably should start figuring out a way to save the starving children of the world, cure cancer, and end partisan politics.  What am I, Wonder Woman?  There's no way that last item is achievable.

I always have such good intentions when starting a training program, and am usually pretty good at holding myself to my commitments, exercise-wise.  But like I mentioned in my last post , I've been struggling.  There's no impetus.  Yes, I have races in mind, but have I registered for them yet? Nope.  Part of my resistance might be my propensity toward always looking forward to the next thing, and not focusing on the day-to-day, the here-and-now.  If I could afford it, I'd hire a personal trainer and a nutritionist.  And a personal chef.  And, of course, I'd be so fabulously wealthy that I wouldn't have to go to work each day, so my workouts could be my job.

Fantasy Me:  Brock, what does our workout entail today?

Brock, Fantasy Trainer: Fuel first, ma'am! Your chef has a great breakfast here for you. And your assistant should schedule you a post-workout massage. We're going to do some mile reapeats with plyo drills in between.

Fantasy Me: *sigh* I just don't know when I'll have time for that massage, what with that interview with the Nobel Prize committee and all.

Just Jack, Fantasy Personal Assistant:  And there's the fitting for your gown for the Met Gala, plus lunch with Anna Wintour, that crazy bitch!

Fantasy Me:  Oh, now, she's just so misunderstood, Jack, you know that.

Just Jack: *eye roll* 

Brock: I know its hard being you, ma'am, but we need to focus now.

 

See? Fantasy life is so much easier to navigate than real life.

But back to the exercising: the title of this post is the truth.  No woman wants to hear she needs to lose weight, even if at first glance she doesn't seem overweight (and yes, I know that I am more slender than many Americans).  So I am asking for tips and advice from my fellow runners: 

What has worked for you when you've wanted to lose weight?

Can it be as simple as "Eat and exercise more"? Because yes, I've had people suggest that I'm not taking in enough calories for the amount of exercise I'm doing.  I've even started making recovery drinks with chia, and added it to my oatmeal or yogurt.  And honestly, I'm not looking forward to the midfulness that eating properly requires.  But if you want to lose the weight and run faster, Rachel...

SOS, friends...

The (Kinda) Young & The (Winter Blues-Induced) Restless

Have you ever felt that your life is constantly on the precipice? And you can never tell if its a precipice of peril or great things? UGH.

I've had this feeling for awhile now, and its such a struggle to maintain optimism.
I feel stalled.
I feel like a wallflower.
I feel like I deserve some positive attention, some good conversation, some fun.

I feel like I should be paid attention to, rather than just assumed. (Does that make sense?)

I have tried to do the things that I've always done to ward off these feelings. I mean, I'm re-reading what I've just wrote and it sounds like I'm a whiny, self-centered prima donna.

But I'm not, I swear.

So, the question is: What do you do to get out of a slump? Where do you turn to when your go-to plan seems to have got up and went?

This is so much a part of my life, this quest for knowledge, for understanding, for clarity. And I know that so much of life simply cannot be about clarity, that it must be muddied and dirty and leave you feeling like you need a hot shower. I am that smart.

And yet...

...yet. I cannot help longing for the day when things will just "click," and I'll be the person I see in my magazine-layout fantasies: dressed in designer clothes, lounging on high-end furniture, sipping vodka gimlets and laughing with similarly clad friends as we recount our latest trip to Milan ("Oh, do you remember the look on Gianni's face when you told him you thought he was too effeminate?" "Ha! Yes! It was like a dagger to the poor dear's heart!" "Well, he should know that's what people are thinking when he wears a fringed scarf with that silk shirt opened to his waist." "I know. And its not like he has the physique of a rugby player!" "Tru dat.").

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to buy a lottery ticket (I'm still hopeful!), use up that jewelry store gift certificate (Sparkly is uplifting!), and pick up those killer jeans at the boutique (A good looking ass goes a long way in boosting a gal's spirits!).

Have a great weekend.